continuing in prayer for Barbara

I dedicate this to Barbara and to my two co-workers quietly fighting cancer as well, Joyce and Cindi, and to all who are called upon to bravely battle against this insidious disease. I am so glad my friends know our Christ Jesus. May the Lord give you strength and peace and above all victory!

TUESDAY, APRIL 29, 2008
Thanks for surrounding me with prayers yesterday as we went to see the surgeon. I truly felt the peace of God as I was there. I read the Psalms in my prayerbook while waiting and wading through the paperwork process and I felt calm when the surgeon came to talk to us. My oncologist had warned me that he did not think the surgeon would be able to help, hence he kept hesitating on the referral. However, the surgeon was straightforward and positive about what he COULD do to help me. He said I formerly had at least 20 sites of cancer in my liver and now there are 6 remaining. Those 6 are all on one side. He recommends cutting out that 1/2 of the liver. He says now is the time as my latest PET shows the cancerous activity beginning again. He feels the chemo. has gotten rid of the other 14 spots but these 6 are 'chemo. resistant' ie have mutated to avoid death by chemo. He said I need to be off the chemo. for one month to clear it out of my body so it will not interfere with the surgery. My last infusion was April 11 and I was suppose to have another infusion this Friday but now I may not. I see my oncologist tomorrow and Erik plans to go with me again so we can see what dr. thinks regarding the surgeon's recommendations. I could be headed for surgery mid-May or early June. YIKES and yet I have to say I am excited that there is something to be done vs. just being told to keep taking chemo. that obviously was beginning to loose its efficacy. The surgeon of course gave his grim statistics about people who have been through this before me. He said 85-90% will have return of cancer in the liver because although the 14 sites are gone, not visible to the scan, in reality they are still in there somewhere just microscopic so eventually they will revive and come back. Of course I am seeking your prayers that those spots will NEVER come back! I already believe that God has removed them! There remains one/two spots on my lung and the surgeon said we should plan on having the pulmonologist remove those surgically too. Soooo it looks like lots of cutting to be done on my body and I know I will go through fears but right now I can say that your prayers for guidance have been answered, your prayers for peace are working! I never would have been this brave w/out the angels God is sending to sustain me. Keep up the fight for us! I was actually smiling during the appointment, only to look at my sweet Erik and see tears brimming as he was once again faced with the fragility of my existence. That was actually the hardest part of my day. I hate this disease in that everyone suffers along with me. We all hurt together because we are one body in Christ. I will keep you updated as we know more. For sure we are going to need your continued support to get through this next surgery and beyond. Thank you all for your willingness to help us in this longterm battle! I love each of you dearly!! To God be ALL Glory. Barbara

FRIDAY, MAY 02, 2008
Here's the latest. Erik went with me to the oncologist on Wednesday afternoon and the dr. agreed with all that the liver surgeon had discussed with us. Sooo he cancelled my chemo. which I would have received today and he texted a message over to the surgeon that I am to be scheduled for surgery any day after May 11. We need specific prayer that the cancer will not grow during this one month break from chemo. , that we can get all the details of our life in order for this next surgery, and that the surgery will be successful and uncomplicated. It is all happening so fast but we know the presence of God in the midst of this journey. Thanks for standing with us as we claim my healing in Jesus' name!

If you in this struggle as well for yourself or someone else, Caringbridge looks to be an place of oasis to unload ones thoughts and gain the prayers of others.

continuing in prayer ...

continue to keep our dear friend lifted up to our Holy Physician!

Blessed be the name of the Lord-when the sun is shining down on me and the world is all as it should be, Blessed be HIS name. Blessed be HIS name on a road marked with suffering and when the darkness closes in on me still I will say 'Blessed be HIS name'.
Have you all heard this song? I echo it and sing it often.
This week I have had to put it into practice as I received the results of my scan. It was not what I expected. Dr. called to say that this scan showed 'activity in the liver, not longer a negative scan rather a positive, must stay on this two types of chemo. that I currently have been on.' As you can imagine this was a blow to me, as since my battle began I have always received good news after every scan. My emotions were raw and I felt shock, denial, frustration, disappointment and great sadness. But only for a day! Then my dear patient husband, my best friend, my angel Lili, and my incredible parents picked my spirits up and allowed me to cry but get back on track with HOPE IN THE SAVIOR. I am now able to look at the positives again. The good news is that my CEA count is still in the normal range, the dr. said there are no new growths visible in the CT scan which correspond to the activity visible in the PET scan, and he did not suggest that I need to return to the heavy intense chemo I was on originally. So those are all things I can be happy about! I also have an appointment with a liver surgeon this Monday. Erik will go with me and we will see if I am a candidate for that or not. I see my chemo. dr. on Wed. and will have an infusion on Fri. Soooo lots of opportunity to ask questions and get opinions. I would sure appreciate prayer for guidance as it is hard to know how much confidence to place in drs. We know our LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST is truly our only hope and I know HIS healing is complete. I extend to all of you my eternal thanks for your continued support and prayers. I would have given up if it were not for the incredible love you have reached out with to me. I am actually feeling great and am blessed with energy to work, take care of my darling five, and spend time with family and friends. The kids are all well, playing baseball so we are busy with practice and games, schoolwork.... Life is happy here and we are keenly aware of how much grace God has given us in response to your steadfast prayers. God bless each of you!!

_{caringbridge.org}

Please keep our friend in prayer. Her husband and mine have been friends since childhood; they have 5 children. She is courageously walking in faith in a valiant battle with cancer.

Hi Dearest Ones,
How are you enjoying life in this gorgeous season of Spring?! I am drinking in the warmer weather and smiling at every flower and little hummingbird I see. God's creation is magnificent and it is all around us.
I am happy to report that our GREAT GOD is continuing to graciously heal me! I saw dr. today and my cea count registers at 1.4 which is normal for a healthy person. He calculated how long I have been 'in remission' and it is 9 months!! I asked him if he could start weaning me off of the chemo. and if that was a wise thing to do. He said at this point it is very hard to know what is wise because we are in 'uncharted waters'. He then said in light of the 9 months of negative PET scans he would like to give me a 'chemo. vacation'. WOW!!! He said the results of this next scan will be huge and will indicate what we should do next. This scan will be next Friday, April 18 soooo please pray, pray, pray for me. I am confident in God's mercy and firmly believe this scan will prove HIS healing power. I can't even imagine how it will feel to not be on chemo. drugs after 14 months of taking them. Needless to say I am very excited about that possibility :)
Though the dr. says we are in uncharted waters, I know my God is the captain and He is charting my course through these troubled waters. I am not afraid as I have learned to trust HIM in new and deeper ways. 'I will fear no evil for thou are with me...'Psalm 23
Thanks a million for your steadfast prayer support!!! The prayers of the righteous are very effective and I am blessed to have soooo many righteous people praying for me.
Praise God with me! Love always, Barbara

_{The war she wages is found at caringbridge.org}

Barbara

is the wife of the husband's life long friend Eric and she is a cancer-fighter, victorious in the Lord (see her site under the link). The one thing she truly understands is 'the battle is the Lord's'. She is an awesome woman, mother, wife, and child of the Lord; she is just plain good people. They became aware of this cancer about a year ago, after the birth of their 5th adorable child, and today they celebrated the baptism of precious little Viv.

We hadn't seen them since before the diagnosis and today we were blessed to enjoy their family, their company, and their home. As God wills we vowed to see each other more often. Good friends are a treasure and for life-long, a blessing. Thank you for Your hand in their lives and their presence in ours Lord.

Barbara - did you know that you were married to a celebrity? ;-)